There is a lot of moral pressure to “take the high road” or to “be the bigger person” when we are faced with challenging or emotional arguments or disagreements.

Let’s listen closer. What are these phrases having us say to ourselves? What they are really doing is feeding your ego…be better than others (not equal). And being better than others by reminding yourself of an egotistical power that you possess may not work out for you…in the long run (just saying).

In the culture of the United States, it is not uncommon to want to “one-up” another person; people can be very competitive, and this means morally too. A person may think they are doing someone else a service because they are donating to a charity and that makes a person feel good. Is that person really willing to take the spiritual high road? We are not talking about being a martyr here…we are talking about looking differently at the moral pressures and brining insight into a culture that has been deceived into believing that true achievement is in how we surpass other people.

The phrases above refer to being able to make a conscious effort in mindfulness by brining compassion where there is discord. Maybe, taking the high road means taking the road less traveled. Maybe, being the bigger person means being abundant with love.

It is difficult to not react while in an argument with someone, in fact, it is in our instinctual primitive brain to be on the defensive. Knowing this susceptibility may heighten personal awareness and help us pay attention to our feelings and have a more acute perception of others naïveté.

Instead of perceiving yourself “above” another person, find your compassion for that person opening their wound to you. Maybe what that person needs is your abundant love and to see someone with an ability to take the road less traveled.

Q: What is something that makes you feel “better” than other people?

Q: What is something that makes you feel CLOSER to other people?